First Game!

I'm coaching my first game today and am getting a bit reminiscent about the good ole days of middle school basketball. In honor of this fantastic event, my favorite warm up song from that era. Enjoy. Let it happen.

Maybe not so fine

I am a cool, confident, slightly rough around the edges, early twenties female. I have multiple jobs, a loving family, two cuddly dogs, and everything else that I could ever possibly want. Yet lately, I can't get it out of my head that something is missing. I spend a lot of time in the car these days. And that leads me to think. And if you know me, that can be a scary concept. I tend to let my mind wander to places that I don't always want it to go. I think about my life up to this point and how it is I got to this crazy place. It hasn't been the finest times these past three or four months. I tend to think of it as actually quite a dark time sprinkled with little layers of light throughout. It's trying to get better, but it seems that life just loves to throw me a curve ball right when I get my groove on. So I'm adjusting my swing and trying to take it as best as I can. This is a new place for me though. I'm not used to being down for the count. I used to be able to pop up right away and move on, but it seems to get harder and harder the more that life happens. But that's just the point, isn't it. Life happens and there isn't anything anyone on this planet can do to stop it. So I'm adjusting. And I think that is okay for now. 

This isn't just going to be me rambling on about how my life isn't where I thought it would be in my early twenties rah rah rah, welcome to it. It is actually going to be a bit of a challenge, for me, but I hope for all of you too. The examination of ones life can be a scary, happy, daunting, miserable, gracious act. It makes you think about your decisions and how maybe, just maybe, you could have done things differently. But there are no redo's. You don't get to pass go and collect $100 every time you roll the dice. Sometimes you go to jail, sometimes you land on Park Place where your opponent has five hotels stacked up. (sorry for all the Monopoly, its been on the mind) Life can tear you down. We all know it. But when you seriously think about it, it isn't life that is doing the tearing, it is the people and decisions that we make in this life that we have been given. I've seen too many beautiful, deserving, gracious, and kind people get diseases that ravage their spirit and the spirits of those around them. Yet, somehow, through it all, there is happiness hidden in the tiniest of moments. And this doesn't just apply to my immediate family. I hope all of you have heard of Zach Sobiech by now. He passed away in May and I still hear his name at least once a day from the most unexpected resources. Zach was/is one of those people. It takes a special person to deserve the adjective of being inspirational during their life. But it takes someone truly remarkable to continue that inspiration after they are gone. He did that. He earned both roles. So it got me thinking, again. On one of my long commutes from one place to the next, his song, Clouds, came on. And I thought about the global impact his story has had. I thought about how I would be remembered when I go. We all do it at some point right? And I realized that while I hope all will be good, I want it to be great. I want there to be a moment in the future where my name is said and someone goes, "Oh yeah! I heard about her!". So that is where I've decided to take the direction of my current life. I've made a plan. And I think it's a good one. So I'll continue to dig my way out of this feeling that seems to overwhelm me and I'm going to find the path that will take me where I want to go. 

So in closing to this rambling, confusing, hopefully semi inspirational post: a quote and a song.

 “Have you ever noticed how we often live on the surface of our lives? Each day is like the previous day. Time passes, and we continue to feel like we’re living a life less than we deserve. So, dive deeper into your life, and discover what lies below the surface….”
― James A. Murphy, The Waves of Life Quotes and Daily Meditations 

  
It is okay to not feel happy all the time. It helps with the exploration of other feelings. I'm just going to make sure that happy is the end result of that journey.

Just Try

When you look back on your life, are you really going to wish you had worked more, made more money, or spent more time worrying? I would like to believe that you would answer no. No matter how sleep deprived I am, hungry, tired, cranky, angry, I remember that I would rather feel this way for a moment just to be able to experience something that changes it all around. A smile, giggle and hug from Sophia, a pay it forward moment in the grocery store or on the street, an amazing meal shared with family and friends, or just a hug, lasting only a fleeting moment but forever ingrained into a feeling. We all have that, or at least I hope you do. That one thing that makes you feel whole inside. That one feeling that overrides all others. That memory that gets you through a terrible time. If you are answering "No, I don't have that" then I pose you with challenge. Go find it. Remember a time where nothing else mattered but the feeling, the touch, the graze, the kiss. Capture it and keep it forever. Take a risk and let a chance encounter change the rest of your life for the better. If you are scared to experience things just because they might turn out bad, then what is the point. Life is scary, but it is also magical and exciting in ways you never thought possible. If you need a little boost to get you away from that rut that you find yourself in, just watch this video and try not to cry. But then smile knowing how much it just changed your life.

Live's Well Lived

I have never claimed to be the best blogger or the most informative person in the world wide web we call the internet. I write when I feel like it and my stories often have no direction. I want to be able to inform you, make you laugh, make you cry, make you do a little dance and make a little love, but most of all, I want to inspire you. Today, I bring you three things that I hope make you think about what it is you are doing today, tomorrow, and forever into the future. Inspiration is often short lived; coming in spurts, but often never lasting. Today, I hope that changes for you.

Our first story comes out of my hometown of Stillwater and a young man named Zach Sobiech. By now, I would hope that all of you have heard his song "Clouds", a beautiful song Zach wrote for his family during his battle with a rare form of cancer. Zach passed away this morning. Living beyond what any doctor any thought, Zach chose to live each precious day to the max that it could be. I only knew Zach's family for a short time as I went to elementary school with his older sister Alli. If you happen to find this post Alli, know that you and your family are loved by more than just a community, but by a nation that somehow found hope Zach's song. Found on websites such as People Magazine and the Today show, Zach's story has reached beyond what was imaginable. While Zach is now gone, his music will continue to inspire and give hope to everyone who has every had a loved one taken away by disease. If you haven't seen these yet, I urge you to watch. I have always said that music can make a moment, but in Zach's case, music helped extend a life beyond that of the physical nature.

"That's what Zach's always been really good at: recognizing what is good and being grateful for it. It's the first thing he seeks out, his starting point. He taught all of us how it's done."














Our next story comes from an inspirational woman who is taking her journey to better health public with an amazing, real, honest, funny, and gritty approach that makes weight loss real and approachable. Her story is one that many of us have been or are on ourselves. She has the courage to make it public and just be herself. Her writing style brings for the approachability that makes a story a story. It is not a story of quick methods, fast results, or Biggest Loser transformation. It is just one woman who has taken it upon to herself to find the person who she really is inside. Enjoy.

Our third and final story of today may not seem like the big inspirational stories I have shared with you today. But to me, it is. Minnesota recently passed the bill to legalize gay marriage, becoming just the 12th US state to lift the ban. To me, love is not about gender roles or status. It is not restricted to a man and woman. It is about a feeling of having that one person who, in words I have heard recently, will walk behind you on your greatest days and walk in front of you on your worst. It is about the pure contentment of knowing that you have found that one person who will forever have your back. So, for those who would argue against the fact that it should not happen between those of same sex genders, I respect your opinion. I only ask you this one question. What would you do if you had a majority of the country telling you that you could marry that person? Just think about it. I am not an advocate of gay marriage, I am an advocate for love and the right to enjoy the benefits of being married to that love. So, this brings me back around to the common theme that music can inspire and surprise. Macklemore, the current rage of dance music who's famous works include "Can't Hold Us" and the ever present "Thrift Shop" has written a song with a message. He has gone beyond the realm of his genre to reach a new audience. Listen to the words, think about the message, and just enjoy the music. Tell someone you love them today people, life is too short not too and too long to live alone.

Homeward Bound

It has certainly been quite awhile since I've posted. I know you've all been really sad for the lack of wit and inspiration ;) To be quite honest, the break was much needed. Over that amount of time, I've been able work, work, go to school, see a friend or two, work, have a drink, work, have a niece, work and go to school. It really has not been all that interesting if you take out the fact that I literally watched my sister have a child. So that is where I will begin..... WARNING: The following content is not what you think...

So childbirth. Going into this beautiful creation of life, I had my misconceptions. People say it is this amazing thing that you wont ever ever forget in your whole life. And it was amazing....ly disgusting. I do not ever want to see the things that I saw ever again. No offense to my beautiful sister and the beautiful niece that came out of her, but dat was gross. I got the call that she was going to the hospital around 8pm. I was at my second job of the day going on about 2 hours of sleep in a 24 hour time period. It is not just snowing, it is literally raining ice. And isn't that just sleet you ask? No, it was ice. The roads were as terrible as Minnesota winter throws at you. So I let the dogs out and I am hanging on for dear life as people are literally spinning out in front of me, behind, next to me, almost hitting me etc etc Minnesota sucks. So I walk around this hospital which I will add is the giantest hospital on the planet. It was a maze. And I had no idea where I was going. And I walk into the maternity ward which is this circle place where all the nurses were like "Who can I help you find" And here's me half a walking dead zombie half scared out of my mind about what is about to transpire. So I find her in her room hunched over a yoga ball with my mom in full massage mode literally beating her back so it will feel better. And there's dad, sitting in the corner with his legs crossed, looking like the epitome of man. Just intimidating. So she's going through contractions and I'm doing my best to use my stupid humor to take her mind off the contractions. And I am spouting just the stupidest crap. I'm like "with every breath just imagine the pain being exhaled with the air" and "let it relax, just every part of your body with every breath" and other things that made no sense to me. And here is the nurse, a trained professional, being like "are you a doula?" She clearly didn't know me. I "watched the video" was my response, and in the end, I didn't watch the video, and I realized that I should have watched the dang video. My bad. So from there the labor progresses and things happen which should never happen to any person ever and stupid people come in and out of the room all day and then, there is a shining light, our doctor. She is the tiniest thing on the planet. She is literally shorter than the bed level my sister is contorted in. So we are ready, after 3 and half hours of pushing and screaming and crying (by me) we are ready to see her. She has this vacuum thing stuck to her head and the doctor is ready to pull. She informs us that she has three tries to pull this dang stubborn baby (have moms personality much baby?) out of somewhere no human should come from. So here's the first. It gets her out not really a lot. And Sara has to sit there and wait. The second pull comes and she gets her to the point where all we can see in this mane of pitch black hair sitting in a place it shouldn't. And this is the part where Sara informs the whole hospital that she is "NEVER HAVING A BABY AGAIN, BUT NOT REALLY, I"LL JUST ADOPT, OWWWWWWWW" And I'm crying and my dads crying and my mom who always cries is just there, game face on in my sisters face telling her to push. So here comes the third pull and this doctor is pulling with all her might and Sara is making sounds that again, no one should make ever, and I'm balling my eyes out and my dad is balling his eyes out/laughing because he's dad and that's just how he rolls. And she comes. And shes there. And within minutes the room is empty again and its just us. The four of us and this new being which my sister just birthed. And I'm so tired I have no idea what is happening and Dad is in full picture mode with eight different cameras and a couple phones and mom is just staring at the baby because its a baby and she is obsessed. And as I drive home literally 15 minutes later, all I am thinking is, "That was gross." "What just happened" "Best family bonding moment ever?" "Just a regular family outing to the hospital" "I'm tired." "What just happened" etc. You get the idea. And that is that. The last three months have been whirlwind of poop, pee, crying, laughing, sleeping, poop, pee, crying, crying, hugging, laughing, poop etc. Again, you get the idea. She is the most amazing thing that happened to this family.  Needless to say, whoever said that childbirth is this beautiful life changing experience never saw my sister give birth. It isn't the process that is beautiful, it is the thing that comes from it. The rest is just a made up beautiful experience. 

 

 

 

Whadda stud

And that's life for the last three months. I'm graduating in August, working a ton and just taking all that life has to throw at me. It has certainly been an adventure. I look forward to once again having time to throw you tid bits of humor, laughter, tears, inspiration. Remember that you are beautiful, but your body can do some pretty disgusting things. And here is the music that has held my attention the last week. Enjoy and welcome back people.

2013-Lucky or Unlucky

Well here we are in the year 2013. The apocalypse needed to be rescheduled. Now some researched would say that the number 13 is one of unlucky proportions that never does any good for anyone. Well I beg do differ you anonymous researchers of the number 13, I beg to differ. Or Freddy Krueger... Besides the point. A year is what you make of it, how much you put into in, how much love, hate or amazement you find in each moment throughout the year. I happen to know already that this year is going to be something amazing. So, here is your must do, not only for this week, but for the whole entire year. Thanks to my newly acquired love in the website Pintrest, here is your challenge. Write down good things that have happened to you as the year progresses. Put them into a box, a jar, a flower vase, anything, just keep them. When it comes time to ring in 2014, look through them and see just how wonderful of a year you had and then keep that jar. When ever you feel like something isn't going your way, and you will, look through that jar. Remember that it can always get better and then go fix whatever it is that has you down. They do not have to be huge life changing events. Something as small as "someone opened a door for me today" can work or something as big as "my friend got engaged" could work. It's up to you and what you think stands out enough to make a memory. Just try it, love it, savor it. 

Now for your music fix. This is one of my many many many many favorite songs at the moment. I was in a bit of a music rut for awhile and then BAM, here is all of this amazing music to keep your ears satisfied all the time. This is No Tell by Smoke and Jackal. Let it give your ears a nice little massage. Mhhmmmm yes. Thank you.

Remember, a year is only as good as those living through it. Lets try to make this one a little better than the last. Cheers.