Thanksgiving

I feel like when I talk about Thanksgiving, I should be like that guy from the video "Leave Brittney Alone". Its like "Leavveee Thaankksssivvinggg Alooonnneeeeeeeee". It isn't Thanksgivings fault that all it has to offer is an excuse to over indulge. It isn't its fault that a jolly fat man isn't advertising for it. Its trying its hardest!! So just leave Thanksgiving alone!!! Some people think that Thanksgiving is inhumane because we kill turkeys. Well guess what?! 1. Those turkey's were going to die anyway, either being hit by a car or trying to fly and 2. no one patronizes Christmas for their hams. Those pigs are real people too! So now I am going to take you through what Thanksgiving means to every stage of human life.

Childhood:
Thanksgiving is just a reason to pick names for Christmas and eat an outrageous amount of pie. Lezz be real here. As a child, no one cares about the turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing and everybody knows no child is touching those green beens. It is all about the pie. The ice cream too if you're that kind of family. So basically long story short, Thanksgiving is the beginning of Christmas season.

Adolescence:
Thanksgiving is still a segway to Christmas. Except now there is that thing a teenager does where they get embarrassed by their relatives. It's still all about the pie but maybe there is some turkey on the side. This is the stage where cranberries in a can become good. Names are still drawn for Christmas and even though they don't show it, they are still really excited, they just aren't jumping up and down like  childhood. Thanksgiving is also a reason for a break from school

College:
Thanksgiving gives the college student an excuse to go home. For the too far homers, its a chance to find out who your real friends are or to spend a holiday with far away relatives. For the freshman, its the much needed respite from the real world that wasn't what they thought it was going to be. For the sophomores, its more about just the break and hanging out with families. For the juniors, maybe its the new boyfriend coming home or a chance to hang out with old high school friends. For seniors, its the last of everything in college. Mostly, for all ages, its just an excuse to go home to a place they would never admit they missed in the first place.

Adulthood:
Thanksgiving now becomes a time where you actually have to cook. Then its just stress and too many relatives and maybe a few more glasses of wine than used to at the time. Little more down the gullet than in the dishes of actual food. It's possibly dried out turkeys, slimy green beans, and collapsed pies. Mostly is needless worry and if you are anything like my family, there is usually more than one cook in the kitchen to make sure everything goes smoothly. Thanksgiving no longer is a segway to Christmas. It is a segway to having to spend more money, cook a different kind of meat and climb up on dangerous ladders to put up strings of lights. Now of course it isn't all as depressing as that sounds. Like I've said earlier, I'm not really an adult yet, I just like to think I am, so I don't really know what I'm talking about.

I wont even go into when someone reaches "old age". Because 1. I have no idea and 2. what even is old age? It seems like people just skip over Thanksgiving these days. I was in like waiting for the Cities Sampler the other day and this woman was talking on the phone next to me(who she was talking to at 5 in the morning I have no idea) and was saying she already had all of her christmas shopping done. Really? And now all the stores are open at midnight on Thanksgiving, some even 10pm. Its easy to get caught up in the grandeur of Christmas. That is the beauty of Thanksgiving. There are no gifts, no lights, no big flashy displays, just a meal, some relatives and lots and lots of whipped cream. So I'm going to keep enjoying Thanksgiving and am not going to think about Christmas until after it occurs. It's an order. No matter how crazy I am, I still like the order the holidays go in. So give thanks, eat pie, and maybe try to eat some green beans(to offset the pie of course).